Tuesday, May 5, 2009
The last 30 minutes dedicated to Carmen....
Had I hurt her? I don't know. I've never seen her this sad before. I didn't expect it would create such an impact. My mind was racing. There was no stopping. It was the best for her. I know it would. Yet something tells me she's not going to be able to forget... I don't know. I see the tears welling up in her eyes.... it dripped to her skirt.... I stared at her. How can I stop it? I took a good look in her eyes. The emotions ranging inside... I could feel it...like I was her. I know how she felt. I've been there before. I could see it now. Pain...hurt...sorrow... it was too much to bear. It was the last 30 minutes. I want to spend the last with her. But how? Not like this of course. My mind slowly started to dift off to other people. I can imagine them hearing the news, being hurt. I started to ask myself,:" Why?! Why am I that selfish to other people and make them feel hurt?!" I couldn't think what will happen. I closed my eyes and let my face feel the soft breeze. Flashbacks started. I saw myself being 6 years old. Playing at the playground. All happy and in my own world. Who is that kid? Where is she now? In here? Where was that kid then? Why cant I just be that way forever? I opened my eyes and found her looking at me. I gazed at her. Those eyes. They told me not to go. But I couldn't. Where was my happiness? I need to find it. And I could by this way. I knew better. I stood p and slinged over my shoulder. She looked after me... watching me go. I need to. This way, then everyone would be happy....
This paragraph is dedicated to Carmen. I'm sorry I hurt you but it's the only way.
Phoebe thought hard @
3:41 PM
